What Is Play Therapy and How Does It Help?

Understanding how children use play to express, process, and heal

When adults are struggling, we often talk.

We tell a friend what happened.

We seek advice.

We explain our feelings.

We reflect on our experiences.

Children are different.

Many children do not yet have the words, emotional awareness, or brain development needed to fully explain what they are feeling or experiencing.

Instead, they communicate through something much more natural to them: Play.

As renowned play therapist Garry Landreth famously said:

“Birds fly, fish swim, and children play.”

Play is not simply something children do for fun.

It is one of the primary ways children learn, communicate, process experiences, and make sense of their world.

This is why play therapy can be such a powerful support for children experiencing emotional, behavioural, social, developmental, or family challenges.

What Is Play Therapy?

Play therapy is a developmentally appropriate form of therapy that uses play as the child’s natural language.

Instead of expecting children to sit and talk about their feelings, play therapy provides a safe relationship and carefully selected play materials that allow children to express themselves in ways that feel natural and comfortable.

Children may use:

• dolls

• cars

• animals

• art materials

• puppets

• miniature figures

• sand

• blocks

• dress-ups

• pretend play

• creative activities

Just as adults might talk about their experiences, children often explore them through play.

Why Not Just Talk?

Many parents ask:

“Why can’t my child just tell us what’s wrong?”

The answer lies in brain development.

The parts of the brain responsible for language, reflection, emotional awareness, planning, and self-understanding are still developing throughout childhood.

Children often experience emotions before they can fully understand or explain them.

For example, a child might know they feel:

• angry

• worried

• lonely

• confused

• frustrated

But they may not yet have the words to explain why.

Play provides another pathway.

Through play, children can communicate experiences, thoughts, and feelings that may be difficult to put into words.

As child psychologist Virginia Axline, the pioneer of Child-Centred Play Therapy, observed:

“Play is the child’s natural medium of self-expression.”

The Science Behind Why Play Therapy Works

Play therapy is grounded in decades of research from child development, attachment theory, neuroscience, and psychology.

Researchers such as John Bowlby, Mary Ainsworth, Virginia Axline, Garry Landreth, Daniel Siegel, Bruce Perry, Stephen Porges, Allan Schore, Karen Stagnitti, and many others have contributed to our understanding of how children grow, heal, and develop through relationships and play.

Research tells us that children learn best when they feel safe.

When children experience emotional safety and supportive relationships, the parts of the brain responsible for learning, emotional regulation, problem-solving, and social connection become more accessible.

Play provides children with opportunities to:

- express emotions safely

- process experiences

- explore solutions

- build confidence

- develop coping skills

- practise social interactions

- gain a sense of mastery and control

Through play, children can make sense of experiences that may otherwise feel confusing, overwhelming, or difficult to explain.

What Does the Research Say?

Play therapy is one of the most researched therapeutic approaches available for children.

A landmark meta-analysis conducted by Bratton, Ray, Rhine, and Jones (2005) reviewed 93 play therapy studies and found moderate to high positive treatment effects across a wide range of emotional, behavioural, social, and developmental concerns.

Research has demonstrated positive outcomes across a wide range of emotional, behavioural, social, developmental, and family-related concerns.

Studies also suggest that outcomes are often stronger when parents are actively involved in the therapeutic process.

What Does Play Therapy Look Like?

One of the biggest misconceptions about play therapy is that it simply looks like children “playing.”

From the outside, it can seem very different from traditional therapy.

A child might:

• build a fort

• create stories with miniature figures

• draw pictures

• play with dolls

• explore sand trays

• engage in imaginative play

• create art

• role-play different situations

To an observer, this may look like ordinary play.

However, within the therapeutic relationship, play becomes meaningful.

Themes often emerge that reflect the child’s experiences, emotions, worries, strengths, relationships, and understanding of the world.

But Aren’t They Just Playing?

This is one of the most common questions parents and caregivers ask about play therapy.

From the outside, play therapy can sometimes look deceptively simple.

A child may be building with blocks, creating stories with figurines, playing with dolls, drawing, or engaging in imaginative play.

It can look very different from how most people imagine therapy.

Because play is enjoyable and natural for children, it is easy to assume that children are “just playing.”

However, play therapy is much more than simply providing toys and hoping for the best.

Play therapists are trained to understand child development, attachment, emotional regulation, family dynamics, and the therapeutic use of play.

Within the safety of the therapeutic relationship, children often communicate experiences, emotions, worries, relationships, strengths, and struggles through their play.

Just as adults might talk through a difficult experience, children often work through experiences in play.

The toys are the tools.

The play is the language.

The relationship is the therapy.

Many of the skills children develop in play therapy such as emotional awareness, confidence, resilience, problem-solving, emotional regulation, and self-understanding, are not always immediately visible.

Growth often happens gradually, through repeated experiences of safety, acceptance, and emotional expression.

Sometimes the most important work happening in a play therapy room is not what a child is doing, but what they are learning about themselves while they do it.

Different Approaches to Play Therapy:

Although all play therapy approaches recognise the importance of play, there are different ways therapists may work with children.

• Child-Centred Play Therapy (CCPT)

Developed from the work of Virginia Axline and later expanded by Garry Landreth, Child-Centred

Play Therapy is based on the belief that children have an innate capacity for growth when provided with a safe, accepting, and empathic relationship.

Rather than directing the child’s play, the therapist follows the child’s lead and trusts the child’s natural ability to work through experiences at their own pace.

• Learn to Play Therapy

Developed by Australian Occupational Therapist Karen Stagnitti, Learn to Play Therapy focuses on developing pretend play skills, social understanding, language, problem-solving, and flexible thinking.

Research suggests that strong pretend play skills support many aspects of development, including social competence, narrative language, emotional understanding, and executive functioning.

This approach can be particularly helpful for children experiencing social, developmental, or play skill difficulties.

• Filial Therapy

Developed by Bernard and Louise Guerney, Filial Therapy teaches parents therapeutic play skills so they can strengthen connection and support emotional growth within the parent-child relationship.

In many ways, it brings the healing power of play into everyday family life.

The Power of the Therapeutic Relationship

Many people assume that the toys are what make play therapy effective.

The toys are important.

But the relationship is even more important.

Research in attachment theory, interpersonal neurobiology, and play therapy consistently highlights the importance of safe, attuned relationships in supporting children’s growth and healing.

The therapist provides:

- Acceptance

- Empathy

- Emotional safety

- Consistency

- Understanding

Within this relationship, children often begin to develop greater confidence, emotional awareness, resilience, and self-understanding.

As Garry Landreth explains:“The relationship is the therapy.”

How Does Play Therapy Help?

Through the therapeutic relationship and the healing power of play, children can:

- express emotions safely

- develop emotional awareness

- strengthen emotional regulation

- improve social skills

- build confidence and self-esteem

- increase resilience

- develop coping skills

- strengthen problem-solving abilities

- process difficult experiences

- develop a stronger sense of self

Perhaps most importantly, children experience a safe and accepting relationship where they can explore who they are without fear of judgement.

What Types of Challenges Can Play Therapy Help With?

Play therapy may support children experiencing:

• anxiety

• emotional regulation difficulties

• behavioural challenges

• social difficulties

• friendship concerns

• separation and divorce

• grief and loss

• low self-esteem

• school difficulties

• trauma

• life transitions

• family changes

Play therapy can also support children who simply need help understanding and managing their emotions.

Does My Child Need a Diagnosis?

No.

Many children who attend play therapy do not have a diagnosis.

Children do not need to be experiencing severe difficulties to benefit from support.

Sometimes parents seek play therapy because they notice:

• increasing worries

• big emotions

• low confidence

• friendship difficulties

• struggles with change

• challenges at school

• difficulty expressing feelings

Early support can often help prevent small difficulties from becoming bigger ones.

What About Parents?

Parents are an important part of the therapeutic process.

While sessions are focused on the child, play therapists also work collaboratively with parents.

Parent sessions may include:

• discussing progress

• exploring strategies at home

• understanding behaviour through a developmental lens

• strengthening parent-child relationships

• supporting emotional development

Children grow within relationships.

Supporting the adults around them is often an important part of supporting the child.

Some parents are interested in learning ways to strengthen connection and support emotional development at home through play.

One approach that focuses specifically on this is Filial Therapy, where parents learn therapeutic play skills that can be used within the parent-child relationship.

If you would like to learn more, you may enjoy reading my blog about Filial Therapy.

What Happens in a Play Therapy Room?

Every play therapy session is unique because every child is unique.

A play therapy room is carefully designed with toys and materials that allow children to explore and express themselves in developmentally appropriate ways.

Children may engage in:

• creative expression and art

• nurturing and caregiving play

• family and relationship play

• imaginative and role play

• sand and sensory experiences

• storytelling and puppets

• games and problem-solving activities

As therapy progresses, children often begin to revisit certain themes in their play.

For example, a child may repeatedly explore stories involving:

• safety and protection

• bravery and competence

• belonging and friendship

• power and control

• separation and reunion

• helping or rescuing others

These themes are not interpreted in isolation. Rather, therapists observe patterns that emerge over time and consider them alongside the child’s developmental stage, relationships, strengths, and life experiences.

Some children communicate primarily through play.

Others move naturally between play and conversation.

Older children may spend more time talking while drawing, playing games, creating projects, building, or engaging in imaginative activities.

Because play therapy is tailored to the individual child, no two sessions look exactly the same.

Over time, parents may notice changes such as increased confidence, improved emotional awareness, stronger problem-solving skills, greater flexibility, or an increased ability to cope with challenges.

While the activities themselves may appear simple, the playroom provides opportunities for children to practise new skills, explore experiences, build confidence, and develop a deeper understanding of themselves and others.

A Gentle Reminder

Children do not always have the words to tell us what they are feeling but they often show us through their play.

When we understand play as a form of communication, we begin to see that play is much more than entertainment.

It is exploration.

It is learning.

It is expression.

And sometimes, it is healing.

Play therapy is not simply children playing with toys.

It is a carefully developed therapeutic approach grounded in decades of research, child development, attachment theory, neuroscience, and the healing power of relationships.

Through play, children can express, explore, understand, and grow in ways that often cannot be achieved through words alone.

Books for Parents & Caregivers

📖 Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship — Garry Landreth

A foundational introduction to Child-Centred Play Therapy and the therapeutic powers of play.

📖 Dibs in Search of Self — Virginia Axline

A powerful real-life story demonstrating the transformative potential of play therapy.

📖 The Whole-Brain Child — Daniel J. Siegel & Tina Payne Bryson

Explains how children’s brains develop and why relationships matter.

📖 Beyond Behaviours — Mona Delahooke

Helps parents understand behaviour through the lens of the nervous system.

📖 Self-Reg — Stuart Shanker

An excellent guide to understanding stress, regulation, and emotional wellbeing.

Podcasts for Parents & Caregivers

🎧 Good Inside with Dr. Becky

Practical conversations about emotions, behaviour, connection, and parenting.

🎧 The Parenting & Teaching Podcast – Dr. Vanessa Lapointe

Research-informed insights into child development, emotional regulation, and attachment.

🎧 The Child Psych Podcast

Evidence-based discussions on children’s mental health and emotional wellbeing.

🎧 The Whole Parent Podcast

Explores attachment, relationships, emotional resilience, and parenting.

🎧 The Brain Architects Podcast – Harvard Center on the Developing Child

A fascinating look at the science of early brain development and the importance of relationships.

References

Axline, V. (1947). Play Therapy.

Bratton, S., Ray, D., Rhine, T., & Jones, L. (2005). The Efficacy of Play Therapy With Children: A Meta-Analytic Review.

Landreth, G. (2012). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship.

Perry, B. D. (2006). Applying Principles of Neurodevelopment to Clinical Work with Maltreated and Traumatised Children.

Siegel, D. J. (1999). The Developing Mind.

Stagnitti, K. (2014). Learn to Play Therapy.

How Can I Help?

If you’re wondering whether play therapy may be helpful for your child, I would be happy to discuss your concerns and answer any questions.

🌿 Supporting children and families through connection, play, and emotional safety.